Morons that yell things from cars

So, I usually just get a bit peeved when people yell things from the car. Lately, on the proform ride on Thursday people have been getting awfully mad at us for no real reason. One lady obnoxiously yelled "sidewalk! sidewalk! sidewalk! sidewalk!!!" as she cut it way to close comfort with on coming traffic. I would really like to try and see her drive her Geo Metro down a sidewalk, or even a bike path, going 25 mph and not maim anyone. She'd be like "no way! no way that could happen! are you crazy?!?" My response? "No, Im not crazy, but you are you stupid (derogatory word referring to females here, doesnt really matter which one...I like them all)." A week later another lady in a ford taurus drove by and she drove up really close to us, then swerved to the side and slammed on it to pass us. She honked and yelled as she screeched by us, and then swerved immediately back in front of us. The waste of human flesh that was her then proceeded to drive partly off the road on the shoulder, and then over corrected herself to put her partly over the yellow line, much to the dismay of an approaching car. Really? How do people like that get their license? How do they think that they are good drivers (because everyone swears they are the best driver in the world)? How do people like that not accidentally kill themselves before they get old enough to harrass cyclists? Anyway, we all have our stories and I could go on forever on what Joe Blow yelled/did as he was passing me in his car on his way to blow joe, as I am sure you could, too.

The thing that someone yelled at us today was actually funny, and it was somewhat of a complex sentence!. It wasn't funny like how old ladies sometimes yell "Screw you!" or give you the finger. That doesn't require thought or mastery of the english language. It requires you to be breathing and kind of upset. What this guy said required not only breathing, but a brain, vocal cords, and at least a weak thought process. I was impressed. It went down like this:

Terry, Kiefer, Josh, Jenn, and I were standing in the lawn of a high school changing a tire. We saw this sweet lilac colored van with a smashed in front rolling our way. Then, this neanderthal of a man stuck his head out of the window. He was sporting the cue ball, with a cut off black t-shirt and a few tatts - he looked like a badass. As he was passing us, he yelled (get ready) "I hope you ride your bike as well as you ride dick!" We all looked at each other, and then burst out laughing. I first took it as he thought we were all gay, like there is something wrong with that. I was impressed because in order to yell something like that, you would have to relate being gay with the enjoyment of sodomy. Thats a huge jump in the brain of a neanderthal. Secondly, though, and less impressively, I guess he could've been hitting on jenn. I kind of doubt, though, that he even noticed she was a girl. Not saying that my super hot/fast girlfriend looks like a guy, but he wouldve had to been close to notice the pony tail and I really dont think he wouldve noticed. I think he wouldve just seen the lycra, and assumed we were all huuuuge flamers and thus the comment.

Regardless, while your humor might have gone over the heads of most, it wasn't lost on me Big Fella.

Poles, Poop, and Protostomes

So, I have an entomology test tomorrow. I should be studying for it because I unfortunately found out on the first day of class when I got the syllabus that insect diversity only makes up about 3 weeks of 12. Crap. If I didn't already know it, I would not have minded learning it making it easy. Insect embryonic development? The hormones and substances that go into it? I don't really care all that much...so, here I am.

It has been an eventful first coupla weeks of school. I managed to trash the dirt cheap the second day I was here. Long story short I hit a pole the school put in the middle of my favorite sidewalk over the summer. A group of people were standing in front of it and as I got close to them they parted in the middle to reveal a pole. I think I smacked the thing going like 10, but I managed to somehow break the entire derailluer hanger off and crack the frame where it attaches. Bad ass. What an expensive, low speed accident. My back still hurts. It is the worst how you are barely hurt when you eat it going 30 round a corner and your bike is somehow fine, but at 10 mph your bike gets trashed. It doesn't seem like it should work like that. Im borrowing a friends bike for a while. One Terry Martin, probably the sweetest professor you will ever meet in your life, is letting me roll an old Trek OCLV Trek 5200 with some 9 speed shimano on it. Its old, but, better than no bike. Its actually a pretty decent ride, I like it a lot, it just looks kind of ghetto...but I'm still crushin the souls of the weak and making the hearts of women quail, hearts of men quail, hearts of my opponents quail, andhearts of quail quail, when I ride by. This is what is important by my standards, and the Jan would concur.

I also had a very dude like situation where the University literally peed on my rug. Just like how one Jeffery Lebowski, The Dude, wanted his rug back after some china man peed on his rug...DJ Sunshine wanted his rug back after Notre Dame micturated upon my rug. Was ND going to give it to the DJ? No, not without some bitching and moaning.

I'll continute the chronicle of the carpet pissers later, but, I must now retire for the evening so that I can own my bug test in the morning. On a training and actual biking related note, things have been going well...aside from crashing into a pole I spose...but you know me, I loooove the pole